There are moments that you don’t want to turn back to. And even if you want to look back, you just can’t. But there are always moments you look back, no matter how old it may be it still lightens up your face. Existence blesses you with both. And realization of the departure of yesterday makes it more beautiful.
I look at the beautiful yesterday when dad consoled me, often laughing amidst tears when his kiddish acts come in front of me as though a moving dream. The little girl inside of me keeps looking back, perhaps her happiness lies in the memories she has.
No, I don’t crave for chocolates, no butterflies, no pink lace dresses and sandals. But this girl want to relive the moment that just passed by.
How beautiful it was even if we lived in a hut. How delicious the boiled potato curry tasted. How wonderful it was to walk miles to get home holding your hands. The cheapest sweets were sweeter when it came from your pockets.
There I stand on the doorway counting the days. You have never been gone for so long. Even if you did, it was none but for my own good. Daddy, did you leave to make my world more comfortable? Are you bringing home happiness as you always used to?
Your baby is waiting for you. I will wait even if its forever for no one can bring the same smile like you did. Of course, I smile but not with the accuracy like in your presence. I want to smile the same smile.
Every teardrop falls from my eyes with the expectation that your gentle hands would wipe it away. But when it hits the ground, it pains me.
I miss you so much. Then I take a glance at your picture. There you lie, just as though you are some where around and that you will come back.
A reluctant step I take each time I get closer to home. My heart senses your absence. There is no warmth for I know I wont find you there.And all comforts gone.
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on Thursday, December 18, 2008
at 11:53 PM
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